Do I have to forgive?

       Definition of forgiveness: Using honesty,compassion and self-awareness to reconcile with someone who has hurt you. Martin Luther King once said. "Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a permanent attitude." If we truly want to be loving people then we must learn to forgive. We must forgive the deepest hurts of life as well as the daily offenses of a family member. Whether the offense is large or small, forgiveness requires us to seek reconciliation if our relationships are to have a positive influence in our lives. We are incurably moral creatures. When we are wronged, something in us says;"That is not right, whoever did this is going to pay for it!" True forgiveness can only come when justice and love work together. Living a life of true love requires us to offer forgiveness to those who have wronged us. Forgiveness is so necessary in human relationships because our freedom almost always takes a self centered path. We all have the opportunity to overcome our self-centered natures and learn to live for the benefit of others. That means forgiving those who have offended us . It does not mean ignoring the wrongs done to us. Our sense of justice will not allow us to overlook unloving actions. If it did evil would prevail in this world. Forgiveness is the choice to love rather than demand justice. Our desire for reconciliation should be greater than our desire to get even.
So what should we do when we are wronged? First, I believe we should rebuke (means :place weight upon) the one who has hurt you. Bring it to their attention. Many times the person doesn't even realize they have wronged you. Second, We should always pray and emotionally calm down before confronting this person or persons.
Third, Authentic love requires us to show respect for the other person in spite of what they have done. They are a valued individual that God loves. It is important that we confront the other person with gentleness, truth and an offer of forgiveness. It is important that we do not let our feelings of hurt and disappointment control our behavior. We must rely on the Lord to help us. After all ,He forgave us by giving His life for us. As Christan's we should be the ultimate example to the world of what it is like to truly forgive. This kind of forgiveness enables us to truly be free and in right relationship with not only others but with the Lord. We must do our part then allow God to take care of the rest. Not everyone we confront will be receptive. When we do not forgive the devil in turn uses this to limit our effectiveness for Christ. I don't want anything in the way of my Savior and I . Be proactive in restoring those relationships that are marred so that you can be free to be used for Gods glory in a mighty way. Also, what better to teach and train our children to forgive than to "live it" in front of them each and every day.